Nooby in Mad God: The First Quests
by GreatOverseer
Summary: Nooby is a noob who just got made and is now on a quest to stop Onyx the Mad God from taking over the world. It sounds straightforward. But the twists and turns that a noob like Nooby will inevitably take will make this quest more complicated than it has to be. Rated T for later content


**Note: All misspellings, grammatical errors, and sudden tense changes are done merely for humor because I can write a lot better than this. **

**NOOBY IN MAD GOD CHAPTER 1**

This was a dark shadowy night at the end of the day. There was an egg, and it hatched to reveal Nooby, a fully-formed warrior. Nooby was just getting his bearings when a voice said something in his head.

"Nooby," it said, "I am Onyx, the Mad God. You must try to kill me, as a warrior, even though you are just level one puny being MUHAHAHAHA!" And the voice was gone.

So Nooby went in search of some items that he could equip himself with. He first looked in the Tutorial Hall in the Nexus which was where he lived. As he go he got stopped by chicken devil which roar loudly in his face.

"I am Chicken Devil and will kill you!," the chicken devil said and charged with wings open like fan. Nooby dodge but Chicken Devil roared past like a semi truck. Chicken Devil then jump over Nooby, and Nooby stick his sowrd into Chicken Devil soft innards. Chicken Devil was now dead.

"You have completed the tutorial," a female voice said. "Please proceed to the exit." And Nooby found he could walk faster for he had a treasure of his own at last: a ring of speed. It was shiny gold and shined in the light of Nexus sun. It was actually Onyx's ring and Chicken Devil had stolen it but thats for another time.

Nooby now emergedin a white room with white floors and white waters around. Nooby see four corners and headed towards one that looked interesting. It had brown door that was big and looked like it went nowhere. When Nooby arrived and tried to open the door red letters flash in his vision: YOU ARE NOT IN A GUILD and Nooby sad and walked to another corner.

This corner took him to spawn where there many people he could relate to, but he didn't relate to any. He had no friends.

"No friends for a noob," they told him and fled away from him.

Nooby had to increase his level so he could have friends that gave him money and items and stuff and fight with him. So he went out into the world through a magic cave in the Nexus. He emerged on a beach near some grass, and soon some snakes attacked him.

"Nooby," they hissed, "you gonna die, boy." Nooby was pinned down by one snake while the other tied itself around his feet so he couldn't get up or move to escape. But Nooby could do the worm! Nooby moved his body up and down and the snake on his feet was confused and slipped off. Nooby then stapped all the snakes on his blade and made a kebab out of them and he eat their potions to replenish health.

Nooby wandered into grassland. Soon he discovered a brick road covered in red dust and moss and things. It didn't look used at all except for some footprints moving South. Suddenly he was attacked by some hobbits with bows that shot him! He had very little health, but used his sword to defeat them and get a broadsword from the carnage. So he was very happy and walked down the road to wherever it went. As he went he was attacked by cube. The cube was fire and shot fire at him. Nooby caught aflame and walked faster around. Then he remembered speed ring and used it to make him go faster and blow off the flames. He then killed the fire cube with his sword.

He entered into dark swamp and saw something wierd. It was an Elf! It shot him but Nooby dodged, the Elf shot again but this time Nooby jumpdodged and sunk his sword to the hilt inside Elf's chest. But then there were more elves and Nooby was surrounded. They started shooting him to death and Nooby was very scared. Then he had an idea. He took his broadsword and threw it at Elf in front and he leaped through the gap and grabbed the sword and killed all the rest of the Elfs. Nooby then leveled up to level two which made him happy and sent him away with new armor and items.

A little way away there was a big fight going on between a pirate king and a few level one priests and the pirate king was winning. "Har har," he said while fighting a priest, "you so weak you cant feet me and now I kill you so you join your puny ancestors in heaven!" Just then Nooby came in and saw the pirate king being a bully.

"Hey pirate," he shouted and rushed the pirate king. The two met and there was an explosion in the sand and sand waves rippled out. Nooby tried to hit the pirate king in his... vitals, but the pirate king only laughed.

"Nooby, you slow, you not hit me cause I'm a level five pirate king! Now you join these noobs in heaven!" And he swung his sword and Nooby dodged and jumped into the air and light made a pinging sound off the tip of his sword. Pirate king swing sword up to block but Nooby slice off hand.

"Aaaah," the pirate king scream, "that my only hand! Now I have to kill you with my hook!" His hook came out and it was big and gnarly and covered in dried blood. He swung it and Nooby ducked and the hook flew off pirate king's hand as Nooby cut that one off too. Nooby then finished the pirate king with a stab to the belly and the pirate king died in his own blood.

"OMG who are you," said the priests.

"I'm Nooby," say Nooby, "do you have any health potions?" They give him potions an he drink them and felt strong and alive and his heart was pumping twice as much blood to his brain as normal. "Thank you," said Nooby, "and now what other items have you got? I wanna trade." They gave him some items to look at and he took a long time to decide and finally he decided on some coral armor which looked cool. When he tried to trade for his plate armor however there was a boom and they were all thrown back. It turned out that all items were soulbound and therefore couldn't be dropped or traded. Both armors were still there.

Nooby set out again and found himself in an even bigger forest, this one with path in the middle and some pools of water to the sides. Then there were rustle in bushes and some Smurf Guys came out. They attak Nooby and Nooby stab one but more come and jump on his shoulders and beat at his helmet. Nooby rub himself off against a tree and kill one, then shake the other off and stomp it till it died and he went on.

So now Nooby got the basics of the world down he wanted to know which world he was on seeing as there were billions in space. He went to house of Elf Chief and he was a good Elf and showed him what world he was on.

To his surprise it was Earth!


End file.
